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Two Passions

by Christine Jessica Margaret Reilly

  • I have two passions in life: sitting on laps and writing poetry.
  • I wouldn’t call myself a connoisseur, but I do understand that
  • every lap is different. I feel like I could stick my entire legs
  • through them, wade knee-deep, and there is still room to fidget.
  • Some laps are small and intimidating, like tans in a bottle
  • or pieces of punctuation. A comma. That was your lap.
  • I remember it quite well. I felt like a big girl, an elephant,
  • before I made my mark on top of you. While nestled, I noticed your lap
  • felt like goose-down. I never asked to leave.
  • I have a real-self role model and an ideal-self role model.
  • Dr. Seuss is my real-self. Scarlett O’Hara is my ideal-self.
  • I say that because I am a loveaholic who sometimes likes to rhyme
  • (though, not in this poem), yet, I wish I was cold and porcelain.
  • Sometimes, in my poetry, I make up opinions just to hold onto them. They disappear
  • like suds, into the crests and grooves of your hands. You wash your hands
  • with my saffron opinions. So I had to make up new quirky idiosyncrasies
  • about myself in my poetry for people to grab, hold onto, sit inside of.
  • I gave everything a title. My nipples, every New York City brownstone.
  • And for the unfortunate things already christened with titles,
  • I retitled. I retitled every song that mentioned “Blue Suede Shoes”.
  • “Walking in Memphis” is now called “Your Festering Lap”. I say that because
  • the song has a lot of pauses, breaths, commas & places to rest.
  • I have but two lovers in life: you and everyone else.
  • I go to a Loveaholics Anonymous meeting and accidentally end up
  • in Los Angeles. I have sat inside of every comma
  • in this poem, testing out the breathing room with my bum. The best
  • one (thus far) has been this one: ,
  • I know you want to test the comma out with yours, so be my guest.
  • The lap-groove felt so lovely, it nearly broke my back.
  • I’ve been told that pain is beauty, beauty pain, and that is all I need to know.
  • So I decided to christen every lap I’ve sat in with: Defiled.
  • I have but two opinions in life: I feel safest inside of you
  • & I think your eyes look like moths, little romantic pieces of decay.


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